I went to the dermatologist and oh do I have stories to tell.

I mean yes, not amazing, like these stories aren’t going to blow your, I don’t mean to imply these are mind blowing dermatological stories, but I do have stories that stem from having gone to the dermatologist.

And here they are.

Your Daily Lex.

So you know I get there on time, I get there probably 10 minutes early, 8 minutes early somewhere there, that’s how I do.

And there’s a variety of folks in the waiting room and they’re all getting called in and I’m just waiting.

And I’m waiting 10 minutes past my start time, I’m waiting 20 minutes past my start time, I’m 30 minutes past my start time, I’m like okay if it gets to 31 minutes past my start time I’m going to ask them what’s up.

And then somebody comes out at around 31 minutes past and I’m starting to get up and they say Lex, and that’s me.

So I was already standing, it was as if I knew they were going to call me, but really I was getting up to complain.

So they take me back and they called me Lex by the way and not Alex which is what typically used to happen for me at doctor’s offices, because when I fill out medical forms I now put in you know Friedman Alexander and then in parenthesis in quotes Lex, like that’s my nickname.

And they all get it, which is great because it used to be that every doctor I went to would call me Alex and it was never worth correcting them because you didn’t see any doctors that often, but now they all call me Lex, it’s great.

So as I’m being walked back to the room there’s you know an aide and he’s making, he’s verifying my information.

First he’s like and so your birth date is, and then he says my birth date, and I say yes what are you going to get me?

And he’s like what?

I said my birthday, what are you going to get me for my birthday?

And he’s like oh well we don’t have that much good stuff here, I could maybe find you a lotion and then he like as he’s talking he realizes that I’m making a truly hilarious joke by the way.

And then we have a laugh, oh how we laugh, and so fine.

Now he asks me a few more questions, he’s like what are we here to see?

And I’m like it’s this, this, this, this and this.

And he’s like great, okay, the nurse practitioner will be here soon.

Because I wasn’t actually seeing the doctor, I was seeing, you get it.

So she comes in about 10-12 minutes later and she knocks on the door.

I always think it’s funny when they knock on the door, like what could I possibly be doing?

What could I possibly be doing in a doctor’s exam room?

Before they come in, that I immediately stop with one second before they open the door after knocking, I don’t know.

But so she immediately won me over because she apologized.

She’s like I don’t typically run late, I am running late and I apologize.

Great fine, thank you, all is forgiven lady.

Then of course I got to take off my shirt with her which is always my favorite thing to do, I hate, I hate getting undressed at the dermatologist office, it’s ridiculous, as I discussed.

I had to take off the gown because I decided I wasn’t going to do a full body check, I was just going to do upper half stuff because that’s where all my issues were that I had flagged.

So if I got bad things on the bottom half of my body, ain’t no one going to find out I guess.

But I show her a couple things and she’s asking about what stuff I use and she actually likes the stuff I use, La Roche-Posay, both their face wash and lotion.

She’s like yeah, keep doing that.

And I was like yeah.

Then I wanted to talk about the acne cleaning pad, you know, the acne resisting pad that I use at night to clean my face and I couldn’t come up with the name Oxy.

And I use, you know, at night I do a Clorox pad on my face, I’m like that can’t be right.

And she’s like that’s definitely not right, if you’re doing that, don’t do that.

But she’s like no, you got to put on more lotion after that so you can do your lotion in the, you know, basically when I put lotion on my face, I only put it on the top half of my face because the bottom half of my face always has some level of stubble beard.

And she’s like no, put it on the bottom half of your face too.

Great, fine, no problem.

Then I show her two different things I don’t like and she’s like we’re going to just remove both of them.

And so she already has everything laid out and she first removes the thing on my arm and as she’s getting ready to do it, I say just so you know, I’m not going to look.

And she’s like that’s no problem, my son never wants to look either.

I’m like yeah, my dad’s long retired but he was a surgeon and I’m sure he wouldn’t be happy with the fact that I don’t like to watch but I don’t want to see any of this blood, knife, whatever.

She goes to put in some lidocaine and then she’s like no, you shouldn’t be able to feel anything.

And I’m like well, I definitely can.

She’s like oh, it hurts?

I’m like yeah, listen, it’s fine, you can keep doing it.

She’s like no, no, it shouldn’t hurt so let me put in more lidocaine.

And then I couldn’t feel it, fine.

And the second one was on top of my head, like where my hair is.

And I’ve had something that developed there over the past few years and every dermatologist said it’s not a problem but it’s annoying and it gets a little bit larger over time and I hate its existence even though I can’t see it.

And she’s like let’s just remove that too.

And I’m like do you have to shave my hair?

And she’s like no.

And so she is going to do that one.

And at first she’s trying to have me like scooch down to the seat so she can see the top of my head and then she realizes she can recline the seat so I’m like lying down and then it’ll be easier for her to get to my head top, fine.

And she’s like this is actually going to hurt less in the arm because you’ve got fewer nerve endings up there.

And I’m like great.

And she was right.

So she removes it and then she goes do you want to see it?

And I was like no.

And she’s like well you’ve never been able to see it since it’s on top of your head.

I’m like that’s fine.

I never need to see it.

I also got a special prescription deodorant which I really didn’t want but she said I could use it only twice a week.

And I told her I’m probably going to use it once a week because I have my deodorant rotation and the easiest way for me to put that into my life is to just have it be one of the days and not two of the days.

And she said alright start there and see how it goes.

So now you know prescription deodorant which apparently will be delivered by the specialty pharmacy later today.

I’m Lex Friedman.

This is your Daily Lex.

Thanks for tuning in.

Here is the Stewart given by Tristim in Cheltenham, Oregon.

Fish valera, sagevalera, fragginole and hyscia, which arranged themselves as the unique two