I believe at this point we’re well past the statute of limitations on any crimes I committed that I’m about to talk about.

P.S.

That’s a great friggin’ intro.

In the biz, we call that a great friggin’ podcast intro.

Your Daily Lex.

Wow, hours, hours and hours and hours have gone by since I recorded that intro.

What were the stories?

I was thinking about it.

I can think of two things I was probably referring to.

One was when I worked at summer camp many years ago, I was a counselor and I had nights off and time off and days off, but wasn’t old enough to do a lot of things.

So on one day off, my buddy Josh and I drove from camp into New York City where we performed in Central Park.

Josh juggled and rode a unicycle and I did magic.

We made, I don’t know, something like $60 over a few hours.

At one point, a couple of NYPD officers came up and we got very nervous because we were there without a permit.

You know, we were near some museums and we were just going around and we were doing our thing.

But they came up just to watch us.

They did not tip, but they applauded.

But we were so concerned that we were about to get busted for doing street performance, busking, I don’t know, entertaining without a license, and then we didn’t.

But I remember Josh was juggling some knives and I called them very sharp, very dangerous samurai swords of death and destruction.

We very instantly had, I mean Josh and I were good friends, but we very instantly had like banter.

Things that we would say and ways that we could draw crowds and I was more the talkative one and Josh still performs circus stuff to this day.

He does a lot of juggling, a lot of unicycling for money.

So good for him.

I don’t do magic for money.

I do the magic of theater for no money.

Anyway, I do the magic of podcasting.

That was one thing where I don’t think we, I mean we probably did violate some New York City statute about needing to have some kind of permit to do that.

I don’t know.

It’s fine.

But the thing that we did that was more nefarious, that was mostly harmless, but not good, but very funny to us at the time and we hope to the people who we were doing it to, is that we would, you know, since we weren’t going to go out to bars, a group of us and a couple other friends would go around at night and if any establishments had the kind of sign with the sliding letters, you know, where you could slide the letters in, we would mess with those letters.

So I was the anagram job.

That was my job.

So if we could see, you know, here’s a sign from this restaurant or corner store or whatever it was, and I could come up with a funny word or phrase, typically some kind of phrase that we could rearrange the letters into, that was my responsibility.

Josh was the most agile and especially if it was a high up sign, he would climb the sign.

He could climb any pole, kind of incredible, but he would climb them and then he would do the rearranging.

And then the other two folks with us were the lookouts.

But we would do this all the time.

We never once got caught.

We never got in any trouble.

We just found it truly hilarious to put anagrams up.

There was one night when everybody else had off and I didn’t and they came back and they told me about how proud they were of the anagram they had done, which was a very, you know, ridiculous anagram that made no sense.

It was like, but if you reverse it, it talked about Satan.

But anyway, they made some message and they were like, yeah, we need you to do the anagrams.

We couldn’t do the anagram without you.

So I have a role to play in society.

I’m the anagram guy.

But yeah, we would go out and rearrange those signs.

I remember at one point, the camp’s rule was the counselors all had to move their cars off campus when parents were coming.

So like on a performance day or on a pickup day or drop off day.

And I didn’t have a car.

So this didn’t affect me.

But my buddy Josh had to move his car and we were allowed to park at the Orson Inn, a nearby bar and hotel.

I still see it, but it looks abandoned when I take my kids to camp there.

But anyway, Josh took his car there and then, I don’t know, several days later, we needed his car back.

So we got a ride and went over to his car, which wouldn’t start.

And when we pop the hood, we see that somebody has busted into the hood of Josh’s car and messed with it and then put a bunch of dirt on top, like cut some cords in his car, cut some cables in his car that were necessary for the car to go, a very important thing in car-ness.

And then put like a bird’s nest of dirt on top of it, like, oh, he’ll never think to look here.

It was insane.

We never found out who did it or why.

And he had to pay to have somebody tow it and fix it, whatever, and it sucked because then it meant we were trapped on camp for, I don’t know, a week or two while we waited for his car to get repaired.

No fun at all.

Anyway, those are my stories.

Don’t arrest me.

I didn’t mess with Josh’s car.

But I did do the other things.

Happy Wednesday, Lex.