I’m gonna complain about things that it’s possibly uncouth to complain about but I’m gonna do it Anyway, because this show is about honesty and openness and fort rightness and I’m gonna use those three things honesty openness and fort rightness Fourth rightness fourth rightness.

I’m gonna use five rightnesses.

I have no idea what I’m talking about anymore I’m gonna talk about thing a slightly awkward, but it’s fine.

Don’t be you’re not gonna come to my promise You just might judge me which you probably do every episode Your Daily Lex We are fortunate fortunate enough to have a woman who comes to the house each week to clean it Her name is Louisa.

We love Louisa.

She’s very Very very kind.

She loves my dog She has a nice job.

Please.

Yes, usually comes on Wednesdays.

Sometimes she comes on Thursdays Sometimes she brings one or more people with her and it takes like no time at all At the time she’s there by herself and it takes a comically a long time but we We are fans of hers.

We pay her well and to show you just how well he paid her and to brag I’m not even a brag, but just to show you that we really do care about her during the pandemic Peak quarantining time.

We didn’t want her to come to the house And we just get paying her every week as if she were coming to the house because that’s the kind of people we are Very classy anyway She also annoys the hell out of me In a couple ways, here’s one She took a very long time to learn that when she came in and enthusiastically greeted cody That cody would pee on the floor and then she realized oh every time I enthusiastically read him he pees on the floor So now when she comes she immediately says cody let’s go outside and she and cody go outside, which is cute But then she comes back inside and still talks to him sweetly and he’s like even though I just peed outside I’m gonna pee here, too I would love for her to internalize that like just don’t talk to him in that baby voice That’s the rule for everybody you come to my house.

We tell you don’t talk to the dog You come to my house we tell you don’t talk to the dog Don’t look at the dog ignore the dog once he’s totally chill then you can pet him But don’t baby talking baby talking makes him pee done his whole life.

He’s not gonna change.

It’s who he is as a dog That’s one thing second thing I have a kindle sits on my nightstand.

It’s in my nightstand right near the where my head goes on my pillow Because I read before I fall asleep And then when i’m getting sleepy and falling asleep as I read I put the candle down right there and then it’s there Every single week louisa comes She takes that kindle She puts it on the opposite side of my nightstand and she puts the tissue box perfectly on top of it as if the kindle in its red case Is a tissue box stand It is so far away not that the nightstand is like gargantuan, but think about your arms and how nightstands are shaped, etc It’s so far away that I can’t reach the goddamn kindle From my bed.

So if I forget that she’s been there And done that i’ll get in the bed and then have to get out of bed again, which is very annoying She has done this every week For forever.

She will never stop We also have a shower Yeah, humble brag.

We have a shower and you can adjust the shower so that it comes, you know from the handheld part or whatever She likes to adjust our shower to go to the handheld part When she’s cleaning our shower But then she leaves it adjusted to that And the handheld part is pointing Out the door Of the shower at you before you’ve entered the shower I would say 99% of the time whether it’s Me or lauren who’s taking the first shower Uh, we remember.

Oh, she was here gotta adjust that thing before turning the shower on When you don’t and that blast of cold water comes out of the shower straight at you It’s no fun.

So those are my complaints uh Worth it.

I’ve spoken to her about some of these things but I’ve accepted that this is how it is um And again, like I said, it’s uncouth I think to complain about because what a what a treat what a gift And a luxury to be able to have somebody who comes and helps clean the house um And you might be wondering hey, are you the kind of people who clean the house before the cleaning person comes?

Yes Well, no, we are not lauren is i’m not um But she does some pre-vacuuming And she likes the kids to make their beds Uh more neatly on those days, which is hilarious to me because louisa definitely doesn’t care But anyway, those are my three uncouth complaints about a person who keeps his cooth Uh, so now, you know, hope you’re having a wonderful thursday more soon lex