Hey, let’s talk about my eyeballs for a minute.

Your Daily Lex.

First of all, let me promise you it won’t be gross.

I think eyeballs are in general gross.

I don’t deal with eye stuff.

I don’t look at eyes up close.

Like if there’s a gross eye thing, I cannot see it.

Every once in a while, Cody needs eye drops or something.

And I’m the guy who holds the dog while Lauren puts the drops in because I cannot look that closely at his eyes.

Oh my god.

So this is not going to be gross, I promise.

I don’t think.

I started wearing glasses at some point in the elementary school era and wore them ever since.

At some point, I got contacts.

When I first got contacts, my dad suggested I get gas permeable hard lenses, even though the eye doctor was like, that’s not what we do anymore.

But that’s what my dad wore.

So we started with those.

And it was, I mean, they make your vision great, so I like that.

And they come with a little suction cup thing that looks like a plunger.

So when you can’t get the contacts on your own, use those little plunger guys to take them out.

But they also don’t feel great at all.

So eventually I switched to soft contact lenses, which I really liked.

But I hated wearing contacts and glasses.

I wanted to just be able to see.

So I had made a vow to myself that I was going to do that, do something about my vision before I got married.

And so in March 2003, I got LASIK.

I got it at a eye surgeon’s office in Los Angeles.

He had a view of the Hollywood sign.

Actually, my actual eye doctor was a woman named Betsy Bleckman, whose name is stuck in my brain forever.

But she was like, it’s cheaper if you let me farm it out to this other guy to actually do the surgery.

So the guy who did the surgery, as you look at the Hollywood sign and it’s all blurry, he did the LASIK.

And then he had you look at the sign again, and it looked great.

Fine.

About a decade later, I started feeling like I needed glasses at night.

And then I needed glasses to drive.

And then I needed glasses all the time.

And I don’t like wearing glasses.

So I went back to contacts.

And I really like my contacts.

Of course, I wear soft contact lenses because I’m not a monster.

And honestly, my eyes feel better with them in sometimes.

It’s just like a little warm hugging kiss on my eyeballs.

I think I’ve used that expression on this very podcast before, now that I say it all.

I probably told you much of this story before.

But this part is new because this is something that happened yesterday.

So yesterday, I’m there, wearing my contacts at my home office, where I’m sitting right now, and I couldn’t see.

And I had a Zoom call coming up.

I just couldn’t see.

Both eyes were cloudy.

When I had seen my eye doctor most recently, I had said that this happens every once in a while.

And he said, that’s just your eyes getting a little bit drier as you get older.

And the prescription is put in some eye drops.

Whatever happens, just put in eye drops.

So I have eye drops right here at my desk, and I put them in.

Still couldn’t see.

Put them in.

Still couldn’t see.

Put them in.

Still couldn’t see.

I’ve now soaked my eyes with eye drops.

But I couldn’t see.

And I had a Zoom now, like two minutes away.

So I rush upstairs, pop it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I rush upstairs.

I pop out the contacts.

I wash them off with saline.

I put more drops in my eyes.

Without contacts in them, I put the contacts in.

Put more drops in.

And I can’t see.

Luckily, or unluckily, the person who I was going to be doing my Zoom with was about four minutes late.

So while I’m staring at myself on Zoom and seeing, I still can’t see, I used my Zoom selfie view as a mirror and popped the contacts out again and did the call.

Not blind, because I can see up close.

But I did that call without any vision correction and eventually switched to wearing my glasses for the day.

So those contacts, you know, which are daily disposable contacts, those were a waste.

And what was really surprising or tricky or interesting or confusing or confounding, it was some adjective to me, was that this was a both-eye issue.

Both eyes were seeing things cloudy, so I didn’t think it was like rogue contacts.

You know, you tear each one out from its own separate packaging, and their packages aren’t connected in any way.

How could they both be messed up?

So I was nervous going into today.

How would my contacts do today?

Like, is there some problem with my eyes?

Can I suddenly not wear contacts anymore?

I know my dad doesn’t wear contacts anymore because eventually his eyes just couldn’t do it anymore.

And I was like, oh my gosh, is that happening to me like 40 years before it happened to my dad?

By age, not by time.

You get it.

And I was really nervous about, hey, will this work?

What’s going to happen?

Will I be able to see today?

And so far, so good.

I can see today.

So that’s nice.

And it’s longer than I lasted in my contacts yesterday.

So hooray for that.

Only other update I can give you is, you know, I go to Planet Fitness.

I go there three or four times a week.

I’m basically going every other day now.

And mine was affected by this power failure, so I couldn’t go.

So eventually I went to a different Planet Fitness, which was further away, which was very annoying.

Like driving 15, 16 minutes to a Planet Fitness is not nearly as good as driving six or seven minutes, six, seven.

But I kept checking the Planet Fitness app and it kept saying that my Planet Fitness was closed due to this power failure, even though like Ani works at a store in the same shopping center and that store is open again because it has power.

So finally last night I called and they answered the phone saying, yes, we’re open again, Planet Fitness, thank you for calling.

How can I help you?

And I was like, that’s all I needed to know.

Why they can’t update the app to show that they’re open is beyond me.

But that person was exhausted of answering the phone and telling people that, yeah, in fact, they were open.

Anyway, that’s all I got for July 8th.

Hope you’re having a wonderful Wednesday.

Goodbye.

Lex.